The Fuhrer helping you preserve your eye sight (free humiliation assignment)
November 3, 2009 | 5 Comments
Well, after this, I can’t be accused of not being generous. I get a lot of little bitches looking for humiliation assignments. Since I’m feeling a bit under the weather and not up to doing much of anything. . .I’ll post this blog with a FREE humiliating assignment for you.
I’m sure some of you spend an inordinate amount of time wanking. Wanking isn’t bad in and of itself but it depletes nutrients from your body, it consumes a lot of energy, and it has been said that wanking too much (which you probably do) can lead to blindness. Not being able to see would *really* suck!
Think about it. . .being a pervert doesn’t mean you have to let your health go to shit! You can incorporate a healthy lifestyle with your pervery!
Here are a few things you are going to need to preserve your health.
- dildo
- carrot (a big knobby one)
- tomato sauce
- yogurt
- piece of ginger
- string
Take a small piece of ginger and wrap string securely around it. Make sure the string is secure. I can’t emphasize this enough. Leave a bit of overhang on the string.
Wash the carrot but do not peel it. Peeling it removes some of those important nutrients. Dip the carrot in the tomato sauce and let it soak for about 15 minutes.
While you are letting the carrot soak, coat the dildo with yogurt. Don’t be stingy. . .get as much as you can coated on there. Remember, this is for *your* health.
Okay. . .are you ready?
Stick the carrot in your asshole. The licopene, beta carotene,and vitamins will reverse any blindness your excessive wanking may have caused and keeping this up on a regular basis may prevent blindness in the future.
Stick the piece of ginger in your pee hole but make sure the string is hanging out. It may burn a little bit but the Chinese claim that this is only because it is sucking the perverted toxins out of your body. The Chinese don’t lie. Keep it in there for at least 10 minutes even if you feel like your cock is on fire. Remember. . .it is for *your* health.
Finally, suck on the yogurt covered dildo. The yogurt is full of calcium and active yeast cultures. So Iguess this will clear up your nasty crotch.
Oh yeah. . .feel free to eat the carrot once you are done!
Debut of cumerella and a few updates
November 2, 2009 | 1 Comment
Hello lovelies!
It’s been a few days since I’ve blogged. I’ve been busy and feeling a bit under the weather. I think I’m all better now. . .probably because I’ve been a real bitch to. . .j-boi a.k.a. cumerella. He’s really really been on my bad side. Let me list the ways.
1) He seems to always question my authority. . .and it ALWAYS turns around and bites him in the ass. I let him out of his cock cage so that I could make the next round of chastity much tougher on him. What does he do? He cops and attitude because he feels as though I’ve gotten “soft” of him by letting him out early. What he doesn’t realize is that there is a method to my madness. He’s locked up now and it is going to be a LOT more intolerable because I put him on a daily cum producing regiment earlier.
2) One of his assignments was to cum in his mouth and take a picture. When I received the said picture. . .there were ALL SORTS of shit wrong with it. Namely the fact that the cum in his mouth was pure white, totally opaque, and frothy. I questioned this dumbass as to why the cum looked like that. His previous samples were quite transparent. I was waiting for him to lie his ass off but he came clean and admitted that it was toothpaste. Why did this fool think he was going to get one over on me?
3) General stupidity and tomfoolery. I have to admit that it is amusing at times to watch someone who is so dumb try to navigate complex topics but sometimes when I’m trying to get shit accomplished. . .it is taxing. It’s as though he is speaking in tongues instead of English and I have no idea what he is trying to say. At least I gave him a girl friend that probably understands his inconsequential babbling. Oh, by the way, here is a new picture of her.
Isn’t she beautiful?
White on Black Racial Play – A Black Domina’s Personal View (Video Blog)
October 26, 2009 | 8 Comments
The title speaks for itself. This is my *personal* view on racial play within the context of BDSM. Your mileage may vary.
And the truth shall set retarded white boys free
October 25, 2009 | 6 Comments
Seems like this particular white jizz producing pig will never learn. That is why I’m turning off the jizz spigot. That’s right. No more spilling stupid juice for you mister. When I send back the medium spikes for your CB. . .**IF** I send those back. . .because if I DON’T. . .you will be using the long spikes. . .you are going to be locked up for so long, you will forget all about the fact that your cocklette and actually ejaculate dumdum cum.
Get a tan. It might help your pasty ass get some common sense.
Go ahead and mouth off some more. You’ll be cashing in your 401K
dummy
From Mz Devon with love
October 24, 2009 | 2 Comments
I get so much love. From my slaves, from my bitches, from my friends, from my family. Well I got a lovely surprise I wasn’t expecting at all. The Goddess Mz Devon had a cute little bear with a ton of balloons delivered to my home. I had no clue it was coming and when I read the card I was shocked to see it was from my favorite FemDom bitch.
I’m not going to mention the presents from the boys because 1) we will be here all day 2) that is what they are supposed to do. It still put a smile on my face though. Keep it up. Every month. Not just October.
j-boi is on my shit list right now so I’m sure I’ll be posting some humiliating shit about him.
Thanks for the bear and the balloons Devon!
Grading my bitch’s assignment (VIDEO)
October 16, 2009 | Leave a Comment
I gave the bitch an assignment to do. He was to leave a pretend voice mail for me inviting me to a tea party. I must admit that I peed on myself the first time I listened to it. That’s the one thing I really enjoy about him. . .he makes me laugh so much. I think I’ll keep him. . .for now. He’s quite retarded and sometimes he even gets a bit cocky.
Want to do some assignments for me? Head to my Media Store and get started!
My bitch gets a GIRL FRIEND!!!
October 13, 2009 | Leave a Comment
So the dirty bitch is busy doing my assignments. I be he is having FUN and popping BIG. . . .errrr. . .tiny WOOD because of it as well. Which is unfortunate for him because he is not locked in chastity. That’s right. . .I OWN his cock. Not only is his itty bitty pecker locked in a cock cage, he’s wearing points of intrigue as well so that his erections (if you can call it that) are extremely painful as well. I made him mail me the shortest points (they come in a set of three with varying lengths) so that he will have to either wear the medium or long spikes. HAHAHAHAHAHA. . .I’m such a cunt.
Because he is such a loser. . .he can’t get a girl friend. I feel kind of sorry for him so I’ve decided to GIVE him one! Now he has a pillow dressed in a sexy nighty that he can call his girl friend. He can hug on it. . .kiss it. . .and HUMP it when I let him out of his cage. Wanna see a picture of her? Here she is!!!!
Yes! You are worthless, pathetic, and retarded
October 9, 2009 | 1 Comment
One of the things that get my juices flowing is hearing the ABSOLUTE truth about a boy. . .especially if he is the one saying it about himself. I sometimes wonder if such introspection is more humiliating or more arousing? I have no doubt that this dummy had an erection the whole time he was engaged in his soliloquy. It was humorous for me none the less. I hope you too enjoy this boy’s journey to self discovery (with My help of course.)
Stay tuned for even more self depreciating assignments from him.
Dumb white boy tries to howl like a dog. . .but sounds like rabid chicken
October 1, 2009 | 2 Comments
This is a podcast in which one of my bitches barks, howls, and whines like a dog for over 2 minutes. It’s quite hilarious because instead of sounding like a dog. . .he sounds like a rabid chicken. How can you fuck up sounding like a dog???
I don’t remember how this exactly came into play but something tells me it’s because he got beside himself and said some things he shouldn’t have. He’s learning to curb his belligerence but it is happening VERY slowly. At first, he made this recording at my request so that he could turn me on and “make me moist” with his obedience and enthusiasm to follow orders. He told me he wasn’t ready for me to make this public and so it was for my ears only.
It did make me wet. . .but not like he imagined. I peed on myself a little bit when I heard his pathetic attempt to sound like a dog.
Fast forward to today. He asked my opinion on what kind of panties he should get. . .so I gave him my answer. A plain cotton pair from the Salvation Army. You will NOT believe his response. . .and I will cut and paste so you can get the full effect.
<<i dont feel i know more than you but i can tell you that im not a homeless person and am not shopping and the salvation army i know my place but im a dirty boy>>
My response:
<<Okay. . .so let me get this straight. You are telling me that you are NOT going to the salvation army to get panties. . .correct? I don’t want any misunderstandings. . .>>
His response:
<<Goddess
im not telling you NO because no is bad im saying im not a homeless person and dont feel like i should be shopping there>>
My response:
<<Look you stupid white sack of shit. . .I don’t give a good goddamn if your related to the Kennedys. If I tell you to eat ramen noodles. . .that is what you eat. If I tell you to wear shitty second hand drawers. . .you wear them. You are skating on thin ice. I don’t CARE if you feel you shouldn’t shop there. I don’t CARE if it is humiliating. . .JUST DO IT.>>
So as punishment, his choice was to pay a fine or have me post his doggie MP3. I hope you enjoy the MP3!!!
Podcast update with a pic of Me and Mz Devon
September 30, 2009 | 2 Comments
It’s been awhile since I’ve done a podcast. They are easy and fun so I don’t know why I don’t do them more often. Probably because you don’t really deserve it. In this podcast I go over:
- My new store
- Mz Devon’s visit
- A real life encounter with a new (failed) boy
As promised. . .a picture of me and Mz Devon!
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